The first step is to forgive yourself for being human. The next step is to rebuild trust. Unfortunately, this will take a lot, and I mean a lot of time. It may not seem fair, but that’s how it is and will be for a long time. I know, I’ve been there too, many years ago with his father. I don’t know if he ever fully trusted me again and later on, my trust in him was broken as he took what I did one step farther; whereas he never confessed and I found out on my own. I don’t I ever fully recovered from that one.
That probably caused the most hurt and why I gave up and didn’t fight later on. What’s good for the goose, in this case, was certainly, not good for the gander.
Above all, be truthful, but tempered with love. If necessary, reread your vows to your husband every day. Remember your word. Remember that is what makes you who you are.
Also remember that your husband has known you since you were 6. He’s seen you grow up into an amazing woman and chose you above all others. He knows your flaws, shortcoming and probably knows you more than you think he does of who you really are.
We all put on facades; sometimes we want to believe in them as we find them more comfortable than to strip them away and deal with ourselves. Yet, we have to deal with ourselves sooner or later, especially when we are married.
Make it a point to dedicate one evening a week, if not more, to spend time with your husband; whether it be working out, taking a walk, making love or any number of things. He is your priority as you have picked him above all others. Never forget that. Marriage is a constant working relationship.
The next few months are going to be hard. Hopefully, the two of you will grow closer from this experience.
I thank you for your love and support. For reasons I have yet to explain to myself, I’ve removed the original post. Mainly I want people to listen to my music right now and not wonder at what I’m talking about here.
I will take your advice to heart. And maybe cry a little. But in a good way.